Skinny Women are Real Women, Too!

We are supposed to be a nation of tolerance. If you criticise someone for being gay, for being fat, for being black or being female you will (quite rightly) cop a severe tongue lashing for your lack of empathy. However, apparently it’s quite okay to criticise people for being thin.

The phrase ‘real women have curves’ springs to mind. A lot of people have been saying it in response to Jennifer Love Hewitt’s bikini photos. Initially it sounds great, after all – real women are allowed to have curves and still be real women.  Huzzah! What a noble idea! But the problem is it doesn’t say real women can have curves. It decrees that real women and curves are inextricably linked. Real women have curves. If you have no curves, sorry – no amount of menstruation, ovulation, lactation or possession of a vagina is going to make up for it and bring you back to Real Woman Status. Too bad.

I have a friend who is model thin and drop dead gorgeous. She is also just as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside. She never judges anyone by their appearance, but sadly, rarely gets the same consideration in response.  Often other women will complain to her about feeling fat and then add a snarky “Not that you’d ever have that problem”.  Wow. Imagine if someone thin complained about being unable to gain weight (a condition that is more common than you might think) and turned to a fat woman and said the same thing. I doubt anyone would see that as acceptable, so why is it acceptable to be a bitch to someone just because they’re thin?

And if you have a skinny friend who is desperately trying to gain weight, please do not say “I wish I had that problem!”

There are millions of weight-loss plans, support groups and advice columns for people trying to lose weight. People are more than happy to support you in your quest for weight loss and offer their own advice and support. There is however a woeful lack of support or advice for people trying to gain weight in a healthy manner. It’s not a nice problem to have and there are many medical conditions linked to being underweight, so it would be more appropriate to show a little compassion.

And lastly, I want to have a whinge about the topic of guys who prefer skinny girls. More specifically the condemnation of guys who prefer skinny girls. Honestly, it’s like society sees it as a huge insult to curvy women everywhere if a guy has a preference for thin women. If a man admits he likes a petite lady, he is accused of being brainwashed by the media, of being shallow and of only seeing a woman as an arm ornament. For heaven’s sake, people – it’s just a personal preference! No one accuses guys of insulting white women if they prefer Latina girls. Or of insulting blondes if they have a preference for redheads. No one says that liking girls with pretty faces is only because of media manipulation. No one divides boob-men and leg-men along some kind of imaginary moral divide. And of course no one suggests that voicing a preference for curvy girls may hurt the feelings of their thinner companions. Which it may well do, but, let’s face it, society doesn’t care if skinny girls get their feelings hurt.

You know what, world? It’s okay to have personal preferences! If a woman likes skinny guys no-one bats an eyelid. If someone likes brunettes, good on ’em. If you’re a bloke (or a chick) and you like women with a bit of meat on their bones, go for it. And if you like thin women, yay you! Thankfully, the world needs all types. Some people are attracted to curvy girls, which is great for us curvy girls, because they’re the ones we usually end up with. And some people like thin girls, which is great for them, because they’re just as deserving of love as anyone else.

So next time you look at a skinny girl and think “bitch,” or tell a guy who likes petite chicks that he is shallow, remember that no one should be judged just because of their weight. Skinny girls are real women too. They have real feelings. And those feelings get hurt when they’re treated badly, when their problems are dismissed, or when guys are told they shouldn’t find them attractive.

Last 5 posts by Charlotte Steggs

Last 5 posts by Charlotte Steggs